the c word

the c word (derogatory word for a woman's vagina/a woman herself/a sexual woman) has become mainstream. people are using it in every day conversation and apparently as a way to say 'mate'.

the c word wasn't always a derogatory word for a woman's vagina/sexuality. once upon a time women were equal to men and we all just got along. until we settled and began to 'own' stuff... which meant men now felt they owned their women and children, along with livestock and land.

in the last several 1000 years the c word has come to mean a bad woman who has too much sex. a disgusting woman. a feral woman. the easiest most harshest, most vulgar way to insult a woman.

it came to be the biggest most derogatory swear word in our language.

now why is it that a c@^t is worse than dick, prick, penis, nob, asshole, ball-sack, cock, bollocks, scrotum?  why is it that their is no equally derogatory swear word for men? how did women get labeled with the worst word in the world - simply because we have a sexual appetite?

the answer is easy: patriarchy and misogyny. ownership of women and of their sexuality. one way to put a woman in her place is to teach her having a sexuality is wrong and bad. men don't have the same restrictions and confinements so they don't get a vulgar swear word for their sexual behavior.

thing is many women i know use this word to describe people who really annoy them and to me that is just not on!

for e.g. one friend called a MRA we know a c@^t and i told her she calling this man 'female genitalia' and that is just not ok. female genitalia is not a bad thing so don't be using that word to put a man down. when you say the c word you're essentially calling some one a vagina or labia or some other wonderful part of the female anatomy. you're also buying in to the notion that female genitalia/sexuality is bad.

that is one reason i never use the c word and don't abide by my friends using the term. i prefer to call horrible men dicks or pricks because that's what they are, though i usually refer to people as to what they're being i.e: angry, mean, hurtful, spiteful etc. they not awesome female genitalia. they are not the very thing they crave the most, and there is nothing wrong with being female, having a vagina and labia and clitoris, and a sexuality.

you're more than just your sexuality

i've seen this so many times in adults who were abused as children. believing that sexuality and sex is all they have to offer. believing that sex is love, sex is how you show love, be loved.

i want to go up to these people, give them a big and hug and tell them they're so much more than that. bigger than that. take away the sex and there is an amazing person who has so much to offer the world. it's just lost under the 'personal truth' they've come to believe about themselves.

i am no angel

i am no angel i like it when you do that stuff to me
i am no angel i like it when you talk talk, dirty when you talk talk
kicken heels, lingerie, pantyhose, foreplay
leg up, on the bar, in the back of your car
latex, champagne, bubble bath, whipped cream
cherry pop, tag team, can you make me scream
i wanna do some dirty things to you tonight
i wanna fly, all through the night
something or other, blah blah, tickle me, slippery
g spot, nasty pose, in a video
love machine, by myself, climax, hot wax
s & m, on the floor, i like it hard core
can you go down, are you up for it, baby
can you turn me out, are you up for it,
talk to me, talk to me, talk dirty to me

there's a lot in there i don't mind. not sure what turn me out means? sounds painful and i don't do pain. i do enjoyment. there's somethings in there i wish i did more often and some things i wish no one did - at least publically. says she writing a blog about sex stuff.
like tag team, yeah maybe but only if it's respected and she's treated like a person and not some piece of shit with holes to stick things into. more than one guy can get rude as soon as they share, make out she's a tramp for agreeing to do something they all wanted to do. the more guys the more disrespect. so yeah if it's a case of them being accepting of her having the desire for it as much as they do, then good. if not then anger wells. it's not ok to want to play tag team then hate women if they like it too. no need to shun, talk down to, gossip about and treat like pond scum after the fact. you wanted it too remember.

guys can't seem to respect the woman for the numerous things they want from her. for example men who won't do raunchy things with their girlfriends / wifes because they see those actions as slutty or whoring. the kind of thing only dirty girls (like this singer) would do. what a pity we're differentiated like that, seen as some girls being dirty for liking kinky sex, while others are pure and clean because they like the standard model.

i here this song and feel like i want to agree with where she's coming from but instead i cringe because i know girls who like what she's saying are not respected and her singing about it doesn't make it respected. instead people hear this song and think of sluts, hookers, porn stars, dirty girls. as apposed to females simply enjoying their sexuality.

of course if wonder how much of what she sings is actually anybodies sexuality (without already being preconceived by upbringings laced in female sexual objectification).

men want sex more than women

been told that since i was knee high to the grasshopper. maybe it's true. maybe it's not. don't really care what the 'experts' say. coz i know when it comes to sex i think about it often and in more detail than my man.

i think about the small details. where; a party, a night club, a company dinner, driving in the car. what i'm wearing at those events, my actions, his actions

i think about things like him checking to see what bra i'm wearing while nobodies looking. what knickers do i have on. are they his favourite? does he like the feel of them. him kissing my neck randomly. him licking my ear while people are occupied. us whispering sweet nothings. he'll  tell me he's thinking about my nipples. me telling him i'm thinking about tickling his balls. random shit to appeal and tease.

i think of him in me too, times, scenarios. but it's the lead up, getting in the head space that appeals the most. the flirting. the teasing. the seduction. SEDUCTION is the operative word. tantalizing. titillating. teasing. touching.

i think of things like him touching me while we watch tv. me sucking on his ear lobe. caressing. distracting. doesn't have to lead to sex. just hint at it and be part of the pre fun, the build up, the wanton.

i think of things like him really teasing me with his cock. lightly touching my entrance. stopping, starting. going in, coming out. lightly touching the entrance again and so it goes until i can't take it any longer and just have to feel him in me, deeper.

men may want it more, but i think about how to make it awesome and fun and so lustful we feel like love gods.

I feel this way when you ...

conversation goes as follows:

i feel neglected when you invite me along to a gathering, insist that i come along, get upset if i don't, only to leave me for dust upon arrival.  i need you to remember i'm there or let me choose to not come.  [by choose i mean accept i'm not coming and don't argue the reasons i should come, and don't try to badger me into coming]

there's a fair bit of push and shove that goes on at this point.  him defending his actions.  me trying to reason my view.  it goes back and forth for a while.

there is either an impasse or a sorry that comes afterward and a promise not to do it next time.  at which stage i start insisting on not having [being forced] to attend the events [they're clearly not for or about me - my enjoyment is not relevant].  at which stage he'll accuse me of not trying to mingle and i'm like, yeah i know, i don't like mingling / being left on my own.  you want me there .. do more with me. blah blah blah yadda yadda yadda

each time i insist on not going, though maybe once a year i get swayed into going, only to groundhog day the whole thing over and over again.  wondering why i haven't kicked myself in the head yet.  wondering why he can't accept this is what happens and accept that i don't enjoy myself and don't want to do it.

why why why .. delilah ???

it's exasperating.  how do you reason with someone like that?

happy australia day

... how safe was it really?

people are calling australia day invasion day yet it was not an invasion. the people coming here were not coming to deliberately wipe out a nation. they were not coming to invade, divide and conquer.

unlike vikings who had deliberately gone to britain to rape and plunder. explorers had no idea people were on this land and by the time they got here (after months at sea) it was a bit late to turn back.

and why would they? they arrived saw it was a nice place and decided to stay.

it is unfortunate that the history of this exploration day turned into a bloody, racist mess that continues to this day, however we need to be real about history.

aboriginals were fierce warriors well trained in mortal combat. they killed and fought each other long before white man came along. they did what native americans (and the rest of the world) has done for time immortal. move into a place for the resources, and kill those who resist, amalgamate those who are left. it's not some 'new' thing white man invented and brought along to australia .. it was here long before white men got here. aboriginals of gippsland didn't fear the warruguls (wild dogs) because they were peace loving beings. they feared them because they were fierce warriors who killed other aboriginals.

aboriginals (and native americans) were not these idealistic beings we make them out to be .. living in harmony with their land. they wiped out entire species long before white man came along. they turned forests into desserts from overusing resources. they raped, murdered and pillaged just the same as all humanities.

hypocrisy at its best

and whilst white man won the battle due to superior weapons, aboriginals harmed white families also. white men were afraid of aboriginals because they were so fierce and were killing them, their families and livestock. it wasn't a white superiority thing where invaders moved in and shot up the place upon arrival. aboriginals fought the new comers and white men fought back. both sides fighting for their lives and livelyhoods* (but no intentionally).

it was a horrible, tragic, bloody war between two nations .. and the explorers won (just like the spanish vs aztecs, romans vs britains). all that's left to do it amalgamate and learn to get along.

eckhart tolle would say that holding onto the past causes pain no longer relevant (or happening) in the here and now. exploration day happened 200 years ago. none of us alive today experienced that bloody war. however we're still treating each other as the enemy (just like north and south ireland with their crazy battle that continued for hundreds of years).

by arguing over 'australia vs invasion day' we're holding onto the past as though it still defines us, and invasion day does not define who we are as a nation (in fact the statement is false altogether). i am not an invader .. nor are you! we are just a bunch of aussie's living in a country we love and enjoy.

we can't move on until we let the past go (and perhaps this mindset [holding onto the past] is what's holding firsts nations back?). it would be like jewish people continually harassing germans for genocide of their people some 70+ years ago. how can you get along if you still hold onto that?

sure there are still serious issues to address such as the amount of aboriginal men being locked up (just like african amercians in the u.s.), removing aboriginal children from their homes etc. however this has nothing to do with 'invasion day' and more to do with underlying issues within aboriginal communities (such as poverty and lack of education) that we need to address.

time to stop arguing over semantics and dates (which has changed already a number of times), stop letting the past define us and get on with fixing issues that are happening in the here and now!

in the meantime let's celebrate how lucky we are to be able to live in this amazing country called australia .. that belongs to none and is enjoyed by all.

hence australia day, a celebration of living in the lucky country.

*i am in no means down playing the tragedy that befell aboriginals, they killed some new comers (men, women and children), the new comers decimated whole families an villages, wiping out entire tribes in some cases. it's a horrible history and an uneven war. and who knows how it could have played out if things had gone some other way ..

electronics

everything we do is a fake

we go on our dates with our phones

we watch tv together miles apart

we have sex without intimacy

we don't have conversations

face to face

eye to eye

we hide  behind things .. electronics

never having to connect

connected

yet fully disconnected ..