pro sex work

i never use to be anti porn / prostitution / strippers when i was young. back then i was only concerned with how unequal the 'sex sells' motto was. how unnecessary and unequal the scene was in the movie devils advocate where the woman walks completely naked towards the camera. the same with the denzel movie flight. this crap happens all the time and i always new it was unfair and a lie that sex sells only to men because they're more visual.

i was concerned with how hypocritical it is for people to harp on about how offensive it is for women to breast feed in public while accepting the use of a nude photo of a pregnant woman, breasts and all, in the local newspaper to promote an upcoming genetic conference. when i complained to the aba about this they rejected my concerns saying they didn't find the picture offensive.

lack of equality in media

i use to be pro sex work and sex industry way back when i was young and naive and didn't know what i know now. i'd glimpsed porn at a friend's house coz her bf was into in and found the story lines ridiculous, the men vulgar and brutish and the whole thing made me feel creepy, like i was some peeping tom. let's face it, if i walked in on a friend and her bf having sex i wouldn't stand around watching. i'd be invading their privacy. watching porn feels the same way to me. so while i wasn't against it porn wasn't something i liked.

i use to think it was a choice women made much like choosing to work at mcdonalds for low wages. some job you did, like check out chick or waitressing, while waiting to get the job you really want.

i use to think it was pro choice to work in the sex industry (because that's what i was told). that is was more widely acceptable now days, less ostracised, less looked down upon, and some part of women being allowed to show and own their sexuality.

i use to also believe men wanted the sexy women they see on tv, in magazines, in the media, in porn. that this was their ideal woman and they would be proud and respectful to have a gf like that. i use to believe i needed to be that sexy woman in order to appeal to the opposite sex.

then i grew up and went out into the real world, did studies, interviews, first hand accounts, read other people's work on the subject and realised the sex industry is far more sick than it appears.

when i learned of things like gonzo porn and girls having prolapsed anuses due to brutal anal sex on camera and people keenly desiring to view that shit, when i learned of awful things like the harlem struggle and making a girl gag and vomit while giving head, when i learned that strippers were frequently belittled, mocked, insulted, sexually harassed and groped, when i realised how unsafe the sex industry (prostitution) is, how lucrative it isn't (so that those in the industry have very little means to escape), how brutal it is because toads want the women to perform gonzo acts, and ALL this leads to an increased demand in sex trafficking .. i changed my view completely on the sex industry as a whole.

none of these things empower women. none of these things better our world, give us more equal opportunity to become ceo's or president or astronauts, none of this betters us as individuals because females have embraced their sexuality (it's a lie), and none of this teaches our daughters to strive for better, to like themselves and view themselves as more than mere sex objects for men to own and consume.

what i did learn is that sexual objectification of women in the media leads to an increase in females sexualising themselves coz they think this is what it is to be female, which leads to men wanting more, demanding more and consuming more and more women sexually. it's a vicious cycle we need to end and we need to end it by
1) females not buying into the sexy lie
2) men not purchasing females for sex