parent child relationship. there's always something wrong

can't do anything right

how blokes speak to mates vs speaking to girlfriend

how blokes speak to mates

blokes greeting children vs greeting girlfriend

blokes greeting gf

blokes talking with mates vs talking with girlfriends

how blokes talk with gf

sexually frustrated .2

don't know what it is about sex.  i can't tell if it's him or me? something all lovers experience?  or am i the odd one out?

 ... he rarely gets me excited or turns me on and rarely get's me wet.  to look at him, he's hot.  the intimacy of being with him, seeing him, feeling him, is nice.  i like sleeping with him for that.  yet, i'm the one who has to touch myself in order to get turned on.  when he touches me he doesn't do it right.  he misses the spot, rubs too hard, too soft, too fast, too soon.  i direct him it makes no difference.  he hasn't learned what my erogenous zones are and no wonder since he rarely touches me any where else aside from the triple grab boobs bum groin.  he does the same moves every time even though he knows they do nothing for me.

he tells me I blow him away.  i'm amazing.  outstanding.  a sex goddess.  he on the other hand blows my mind rarely.

i read that women should take control of their own orgasm instead of relying on the man.  i'm not sure if that means all the  time?  it's all the time in my case.  if i want to orgasm i'm the only one who's going to get the job done.  again, i can't rely on him. he doesn't move in ways that bring me to climax and he doesn't touch me.  i have to do it myself or it doesn't happen.

i get so frustrated i think i may as well just do myself and use a vibrator for all the role he plays in my sexual pleasure.  again, i don't know if this is normal?  are all guys like this?  so lacking in knowledge or desire to please a woman?  or is he the odd one out?  is it something that can be learned or taught or do you have to have the desire and interest in the first place?  that's just the thing.  he doesn't seem to have the desire to improve or even wish he was a better lover.

when we talk about it his attitude is usually one of self-defeating self-pity.  he'd rather give up than try.  because the alternative means putting in the hard yards.  i get the sense he doesn't want to put in that effort.  he's worried putting in the effort will equal long and arduous sex sessions while he wants simple easy sex sessions.  quickies.  frustrating!

when i talk to girl friends their responses are usually that he's a dud but i don't know if this is true of just him.  what if all guys are duds?  what if his sexual ways are typical of men?  when i speak to guys about this they either advise me to give him directions (which i've done) or ditch him and go with them instead because they claim they're better.  again, who's to say they're also not going to be duds?  all talk and no action?

what the hell is a girl to do to get a guy to improve his skills and performance in bed?