i'm not jolly. i bloody miserable and this idea that i have to be around people, smiling and faking and pretending i give a shit about life. makes me want to run and hide.
"hi how are you?"
"fine thanks, you?" and i've got to pretend to be happy and appreciative of life and happy to see them, happy to be there interacting with people.
when what i really want to say is i'm shit actually, life is one fuckn' big joke, i hate it, and i hate having to pretend i'm having a good time. and i don't give a shit how happy you are and that you can't relate to me coz i can't relate to you and i'm sick of pretending.
i'd love to be able to go up to people and when they ask me how i am i can turn around and say i'm shit actaully and i don't want to be here making small talk with you when i feel this shit.
ah.... fuck it....
No comments:
Post a Comment